How many times did I kill him in his sleep?
Not once. I always slayed him face to face.
Probably before he was a father Frank Zappa wrote:
“If your children knew how lame you really were,
they’d kill you in your sleep.” My father never 
had a chance to kill his, but his brother did.
He waved a rifle at him in a bar and took
some of his paycheck before he lost it all.
His son killed him with silence.
My mother’s brother told me to call
“The Suicide of Europe” “The Homicide of Europe,”
and then the poem would work. He was in analysis
at the time, and can tap into rage within seconds
at 87 still. He was good, but not good enough.
I have no children to make death to me.