1

Feel sorry for yourself
Put on a sad face
Dress in fatigues
Be hard to please
Tell them you’re fine   
sniff sniff   never better  
Talk about the weather  
Be ambiguous unclear and indirect
SHOW them you’re upset
Tell them nothing
they might otherwise on their own suspect

2

Know your target   
(It’s always the one who cares)
Even the score wage a cold war    
Gently reject and refuse them   confuse them 
Make them regret 
how you were wronged  
how your needs weren’t met
Be your own work of fiction   
a living contradiction
the center of their attention
at the far end of the couch  
buried in your book 
If you’re standing   just crouch

3

Be highly and visibly invisible  
Appear  disappear 
Make them fear the end is near 
Collapse  relapse  
Be a tower of Jell-O  a puddle of drool  
Let your shoulders hunch  sag 
Never nag    Above all be cool     
Why shout  when you can pout   lie about
A  moan every now and then   can’t hurt
Just Sighhhhhhhhhhhh  when in doubt   

4

Strategize 
improvise 
Neglect the call of lust
Dishes in the sink 
but don’t forget to dust
Let your silence do the talking 
facial expressions impressions  depression
use your eyes
Downcast  sullen   vacant  unglued 
Make like a willow   weep into your pillow
Woe is me   am i blue

5

Always leave the door open   just a crack  
so you’re ever on display
flat on your back
A shared misery can take hours
or drag on for days
But surely they’ll surrender
You have your ways
And until then…finally

6

Just remember
Don’t speak  play hide and seek  refuse to eat 
stock up on snacks   dress all in black   

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