In the dark she would whisper 
all the ways I could go— 
off the ledge   a speeding car 
No one would have to know 

Bury myself inside myself 
or maybe under a scalpel 
Be consumed by alcohol 
one bite of a poisoned apple 

Two girls still in pigtails 
leading second-hand lives… 
we wiped blood off floors 
our swollen lips  
one—her inner thighs 

Polished silver with our tears 
while the living room was dying 
All the shades were at half-mast 
leaky faucets all but crying 

We shared the unspoken 
six years apart 
I never ever told on her 
I didn’t have the heart 

We ate scraps off broken plates 
gnawed on bones down to the marrow 
counted blessings on both fingers 
that our escapes were only narrow 

I attended all my “funerals”—
parents stiff with remorse 
My brother delivered the eulogies 
my sister rolled her eyes   of course 

I went looking for the moon                   
till I dreamed the Milky Way                     
How I floated out of my body 
remains a mystery to this day                 

Say what you will 
but what else can I say? 

One was a good girl 
the other was not 
I said very little 
and that said a lot